Welcome to the New Year

I hope everyone has had a fantastic holiday season and enjoyed themselves however they chose to welcome in the New Year. I find it natural at this time of year to reflect on what has passed; This recent cycle around the sun has been full of ups and downs. One of the major changes for myself this year was when I decided it was finally time to leave my job. I have worked in a special needs school over the past nine years and although the job was rewarding, it did take its toll. With both my body and mind telling me that it was time to move on, I finally gave in and listened. This was back in August and, honestly, it was one of the most difficult decisions I have had to make in my life. As I previously mentioned I had worked there for many years, I had good friends and colleagues, it felt like a family environment and I worked closely with the young people in my care. I felt like I was letting a lot of people down but the job was very demanding and is more of a lifestyle than just something I do for a living. I do not begrudge this, as the experience I have gained is so very valuable and it has shaped the person I am today.

This was back in August and, honestly, it was one of the most difficult decisions I have had to make in my life. As I previously mentioned I had worked there for many years, I had good friends and colleagues, it felt like a family environment and I worked closely with the young people in my care. I felt like I was letting a lot of people down but the job was very demanding and is more of a lifestyle than just something I do for a living. I do not begrudge this, as the experience I have gained is so very valuable and it has shaped the person I am today.

After making this move towards a different lifestyle, I took some time out to decompress. A few months have passed and I now feel like I am finally able to be myself. I know this may seem to be a very strange statement to make, but to have no pressures on my plate I have been able to think a little more about what is important to me.

I started this blog back in September and my posts were sporadic, to say the least. However, I have found the urge to come back and continue to write them, even if just for myself. I enjoy the process of getting what is in my head onto the (virtual) page and I almost find it therapeutic. When I first started my blog it was about all things ‘Pagan’ and although this is still a big part of my life, I wish to vary the content a bit. I am, after all, a normal woman living quite a regular and boring life. This blog will be just me, on a page, and it gives me the space to write about all the things that pique my interest, whatever they may be.

With all that said, I must admit, I am excited to see what the year of 2017 holds for myself and those closest to me. Although last year may have been tough at times, it may have been an essential change which I should have done long ago. My next great challenge is to find a career that compliments who I am, that does not feel like a chore and is something that I enjoy getting up for.

I have found that from school to college to work, I have never known which path to take. I remember choosing my GCSEs in secondary school, we were all sat in a french lesson and the teacher came in and put a piece of paper in front of us. They gave a brief explanation of what we were about to do (tick so many GCSE boxes and one GNVQ box) and that was it. I remember thinking ‘I wish I had time to discuss this with my parents’, however, I went along and selected what seemed interesting at the time. I did not really understand what I was meant to do, and it wasn’t until year 11 that I realised I had completely missed out on a set of options as they were on the back page, including Art which I would have loved to have picked.

And from that point, my journey seems to be one big mess, and I have never had any idea of a career I wanted to do. I’ve bumbled along picking up a few qualifications along the way but now find myself one year away from 30, with no strong career, feeling like I am back at the beginning again.

However, I am lucky to have this time to think and focus on myself, I realise it is a luxury that many cannot afford. I once read a quote that said ‘trust in the path unseen’, and I suppose that is exactly what I’m doing. Here’s hoping it leads me somewhere fabulous!

Cheers

toast

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